A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, stating the following
:"HELP WANTED. Must be able to type; must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an
Equal Opportunity Employer."
A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at
the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.
Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and
was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he led him into the office.
Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.
The manager said "I can't hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type." The dog jumped down
, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and
trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair.
The manager was stunned, but then told the dog "the sign says you have to be good with a computer".
The dog jumped again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with
various programs and produced a sample spreadsheet and database and presented them to the manager.
By this time the manager was totally dumbfounded! He looked at the dog and said "I realize that you
are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I still can't give you the
job."
The dog jumped down and went to a copy the sign and put his paw on the sentences that told about
being an Equal Opportunity Employer. The manager said "Yes, but the sign also says that you have to
be bilingual."
The dog looked at the manager calmly and said, "Meow!"
Never Talk to the Parrot
Mrs. Peterson phoned the repairman because her dishwasher quit working. He couldn't accommodate her
with an "after-hours" appointment and since she had to go to work, she told him, "I'll have the key
under the mat. Fix the dish washer, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check. By the
way, I have a large Rottweiler inside named Killer; he won't bother you. I also have a parrot, and
whatever you do, do not talk to the bird!"
Well, sure enough the dog, Killer, totally ignored the repairman, but the whole time when he was
there, the parrot cursed, yelled, screamed, and almost drove him nuts.
As he was ready to leave, he couldn't resist saying, "You stupid bird, why don't you shut up!"
To which the bird replied, "Killer, get him!"